Thursday, May 21, 2009

WHY DON'T YOU FIND OUT FOR YOURSELF?

THE SANEST DAYS ARE MAD...

*deep breath* I don't have a MC or Visa card, but Hutch does. I hope to get with him this weekend and book a flight to ... NEBRASKA.

Picked dates in October, and did as much scouting on line as I could ... it makes me nervous with expectation, trying to figure out where things were to each other in my 'new' hometown. Worse case scenario, I will have to fetch one of those prepaid thingys, and see what happens.

What spurred me to take this step is the ad on the welcome screen talking about the big savings on trips. And I thought ... now is the time. I mean, I ask myself often about being wrong. Nothing flippant here, I mean there are some concerns. I won't have to let my Dad know anything until September, but it makes me nervous to think about making such a big, big move.

But man, when I remember that I didn't think this much about driving down to Toledo with THAT woman years ago ...

THEN YOU'LL SEE THE PRICE ...

To purchase this package, will be a huge step for me. I have been figuring things out and have asked myself all the questions ... from getting from the Airport to my hotel, and from my hotel to where I need to go to do my housing paperwork. Before, when I would speak with Nebraska about this trip, I think we couldn't come to terms because for me, it is fine for it to be utilitarian visit. To 'show off' the place would be overkill. Besides, I don't budget for 'extras'.

I told her, as long as I get the paperwork filled out, I can sit in my room until it is time for my flight to leave ... and I am serious. What more should I worry about after getting the big thing done? Same thing regarding my permanent move. Just make sure the utilities are on, and I will be fine. I have slept on floors, cars, and OUTSIDE, not in a tent either.

Perhaps her sense of responsibility and civic pride gets a tad bruised when I have spoken about what COULD happen if things aren't what I hope they will be. The uncertainty is normal because when you are trying to do something major in your life, you will have to talk yourself into actually going on and doing what you think is THE thing to do.

And it isn't the thing to do because you have talked yourself into it, it is the thing to do because IT IS.

...VERY CLOSELY

Besides, I am sure that once I get to do an 'on site' inspection, I will feel a sense of vindication. See, one of those 'degrees of separation' from our lives that makes up part of my 'intuitive sense' is there as well. That it was made AFTER our meet in '07, makes it mean even more to me.

Do plan on doing a lot more 'listening' than 'talking' when I move there. I am thinking that once I get my paperwork done, I will be leaving Detroit around March or April. If there is any quality about me that gets misinterpreted the most, it is my ability to follow and still consider myself 'the man'. It is sorta 'theory and practice' kind of issue. I have found that the better the quality of person that 'she' is, the less of a point of contention that is.

Anywho, I think that I can trust her to do right by me.

REMEMBER THAT NOTHING IS ACCOMPLISHED WITHOUT DARING

That is for the butterflies!!

6 comments:

Libby said...

mark, from what i'm getting, it seems as if your life is gonna change dramatically here. and, you know, i admire the kind of courage that's going to take! i could use a bit of that from time to time...:-)

Beth said...

That's great, Mark! It really IS a great time to book a trip, and who doesn't like a bargain? It will give you more of an idea of the area and what you can look forward to. I'm happy for you! Hugs, Beth

Ken Riches said...

Looking forward to hearing more details in less than a month :o)

Sage Ravenwood said...

The sanest days are mad...I absolutely love that saying. I might quote you on it someday.

Awesome news about continuing to move forward toward Nebraska. Breath hon...you have already done your footwork, you know the steps needed ahead. (Hugs)Indigo

Cathy said...

What adventures ahead for you! Inside and out. Visible and invisible to others. I'm esp glad to hear of "her" and your changes in a certain direction. You have SO much more to do, and why do it from only one vantage point? Get spaced out man! Share the wealth of your ways, your thoughts, your journey as it is so far. SO much more....

betty said...

I think its great you are starting to put the trip into concrete days/planning for it making reservations, etc. Once you get settled, you can always pick up things here and there at yard sales, craigslist., etc. this is very exciting news Mark!

betty