Saturday, October 11, 2008

THIRTEEN

BUT FIRST, A WORD ABOUT TODAY

Scheduled a 'punishment run' for today, but given the emotional squall from being upset with AKA, I wasn't sure if I was up for it. Had different objectives for the day, so I dilly-dallied a bit, then finally got it in gear.

Running set the endorphins loose, so though I labored a bit, I was able to get into it. Then passing two cats at a bus stop, one of them jumped up to catch my attention. I turned and it was a cat who I grew up with, who lived across the street! As soon as I stopped and look, his name jumped into my mind!

He turned to his friend, and joked that "I was trying to act like I did not know who he was." I said, "How you going to play me, when I called you by your full name!"

I stopped and we chatted until his bus came. One thing that I have really liked about meeting cats from back in the day, when they talk about my boxing, they never mention the big fight I lost, but all the tough wins, and hard fights that I fought. No one ever brings up the 'other fights'.

Thinking back on how I almost was going to let the day go by, I was glad that I did, if all that happened was my running into my old friend. That was worth all the effort, getting out and going ahead with my day.

Oh, I got ALL of my goals attended. Oh, and UNC claimed a signature win today!

"We cannot take this uncertainty too seriously, and it is important to be prepared for it from the beginning."

Every now and again, I 'bug' Nebraska about my coming out her way. And admittedly it is a little bit far out to be worrying about it. There is so much that can happen between now and then. But I have been telling myself that THIS is where I was headed since March of this year. My away trip there will put to rest many of my concerns.

In life, many of what causes uncertainty in people comes from external sources. Often, we don't know how hair brained, how silly or just plain stupid is, until we let our intentions out. Then we get meek, and fret over all the things that others say is 'wrong' with our desires, our passions.

So in the preparations part, find out who has judgements that you can feel secure in, values that you share and a confidence that you trust, IMPLICITLY. You can take counsel from them, and consider what they say about your hopes. But since it is in the planning stages, you can make adjustments as needed without losing sight of your goal.

It doesn't bother me, for example, that she may be exasperated at some of the questions I have for her. I am just as exasperated at how certain areas that I speak about her city, are to her 'rough'. Right. And they grow petunias around ol' Denby High ... oh, I live on the west side, so perhaps I should give a shout to the fine, fine neighborhoods around Cody and Redford High. Those place AREN'T even rough, but that is because I have become sensitized to it. You gentle reader, would perhaps be of a different mind.

There is a blogger that is out here and she is a teacher somewhere around here, and she sometimes make a 'Jenny count' when she leaves in the morning. Me, I just say 'hey' to them on my run ... they do what they do and when I see them in the afternoon during their 'down' time, I chat with them, to give them a sense of being a normal person.

Anywho, the uncertainty is there, and it is a real thing. So I address my concerns, because when time comes for action, YOU ACT. Now is the time to ask what's what, and when the time comes, all you have to do, is what you have to do. Period.

EPILOGUE

Still haven't processed that mess with AKA, and since she taken a path that leads to irrelevancy in my life ... well, WHO CARES?

9 comments:

Bucko (a.k.a., Ken) said...

Sorry things are the way they are with AKA. I agree that you need someone you can implicitly trust, both as your partner and for your true friends. Glad you made the effort to get out and ended up seeing an old friend :o)

Beth said...

Sounds like today ended up being a lot better than you thought it would! How cool that you ran into an old friend!

And yeah...NC got the win. Pretty exciting game, though, huh? I thought of you!

Hugs, Beth

Indigo said...

I always thought it was amusing Alaina counted...sounds like your day was well spent. Great to see you back with Stars...somehow, someway we are going to connect on this side of the blogsphere. I added myself as a follower lets see if it sticks this time...Wasn't sure if you knew where I was over here, so I thought I would leave my journal addy for you. I miss hearing from you! (Hugs)Indigo

http://deafscreams.blogspot.com/

Malagutigrrl said...

Sounds like the run was a good idea! (Although I'm not sure what you mean by "punishment" run). I'm sorry to hear about AKA but you know sometimes people just come in and out of your life and right now she seems to be going out. But it's all cycles. Everything is a great big circle. You'll be laughing about this together one day. (I hope).
XO
mj

Myra said...

The times when you least feel like working out, are usually the best work outs. This one had an added bonus of meeting up with an old friend. You'll get to where you're going, and then some. Life is always moving forward!

I'm Just Musing said...

I know you have read my blog, probably since it's inception, but this is the first time I have really "read" yours.
You have said this to me in the past, and I beleive you are correct, you and I are very much alike, maybe from different places and backgrounds, but still very much the same.

Tawnya said...

I have people that float into my life on occasions, sometimes to make trouble and then float right back out... Sometimes you gotta just consider the source and move on, ya know???? Glad to see you here...

a corgi said...

people can look at an area and get two different perspectives of it; for example, there's a part of the Montana city we used to live in that is considered "rough" but my bestest of friends grew up in that area and only has positive things to say about it, yet you couldn't convince my husband to buy a home there; so perhaps Nebraska has her own perception since she is so close to the situation; I would go with your gut instinct what you think is a good area to be in; you are wise and smart; I think you'll be able to read the situation of where to be that is best for you

betty

miss alaineus said...

jenny count seems so much kinder then 'hooker or lady'. i may have to run with that...

hope the thing with teej went well. mongolian is AWESOME. i need to go there.

pizza pap's there is pretty decent too, not as good as greektown for the ambiance, but still awesome eats.

regards.

xxalainaxx