Sunday, December 16, 2007

... like my music ...

 
… and I considered it for a moment …
 
Oof ..!  That is the sound you hear from your opponent when you whack him to the body with a good shot … and that is what happened to me … ol’ Nebraska caught me in the gut with a good one … so I went and thought about things …
 
… I tend to do a lot of projection based on how I interpret the information at hand … not always cool … and as often as I can be RIGHT … I am even more likely WRONG …  So I am really going to use my ‘thought bubbles’ a lot more … there isn’t anything wrong with tempering my excitement … kind of like when former Fed Chair Alan Greenspan warned of ‘irrational exuberance’ in the economy … I suffer from that … do I need to change ..?
 
… watching the weeper, ‘The Notebook’, has me rethinking yet again, what I should do … after getting over the ‘…uh, Mook, you mean you wouldn’t want to watch this WITH me rather than by yourself ..?’ thing, it became a broader thought … wondering what would a woman do if they were actually in a relationship that was similar to that … falling in love that crosses all of those lines, has no reasonable expectation of bearing fruit, yet there it was … and that is when it hit me …
 
… not INSIDE the nose … OUTSIDE … see, it really isn’t about the woman as much as it is the man … so it is about ME … what do I feel and what do I want … and it isn’t like I don’t know better … Desires and longings … they aren’t supposed to be understood … it is the not knowing, the perplexity that has the value … I am just to HAVE it … the biggest thing is that I don’t waste my longing …
 
… that was what the movie was about … the man just wanted the woman … everything else was secondary … he wasn’t rendered immobile by his wanting … he didn’t know for sure that he would ever have her … but he did what he could do … and it was, in the end … more than enough …
 
… and I KNOW that already … so let your experience work for you, alright ..? You ain’t no alley cat, scrounging for a meal ..!  Love works the way it does for a reason … you do YOUR job … the rest is out of your hands …
 

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