Sunday, August 22, 2004

Meandering ...

Sweating from a short ride, upon which I have confirmed what I have know for quite some time … I am aging rapidly, as I no longer summon the will to work like I should on my conditioning.

            I have the poem, ‘Invictus’ copied and pasted … reading it today, I hope to draw the needed strength from it, to go on and push with the rest of my life.  The thing is, I have refused to learn from my past, and have gone on to repeat the same errors, time and again.

            Reading the poem, I see where the opportunity to truly be the ‘captain of my soul’ I have instead chosen to give in and to accede the proprietary authority of my life to the fates.  And that is contrary to the notion of being ‘the captain of my soul’.

            My birthday would be the early date.  School would be in session, and I can leak out during the day.  I will have to really set a plan up, and purposefully make my next move.  One of the things I should consider, is the true envisioning of my next step.  I am pretty sure that the job market will open up for me.  UPS offering the benefits is too good to pass up.  That would put my health on the forefront of things I need to get done, along with college.

             One day, I will sit down and honestly assess my positioning.  One of the things about being so introspective, is that you carry a conscious … and it prevents you from doing what you may need to do to get across the chasms between peaks.  It basically comes down to doing what is best, even when it isn’t easy…





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