First day back in school… and it felt long! But I am going to make it. I think that both instructors will be interesting enough and I do plan on making a big investment in getting top scores from both courses. Spanish should be fun, what with the large Latino population in Omaha. And Sociology is a “Mark Course”, particularly with an instructor who seems to have more to offer in the way of his personal experiences.
Haven’t found a way to post my videos of me lifting weights yet… I can’t seem get them from my Google Drive to share them anywhere else. The idea isn’t to show the videos to impress anyone, as it is to show who I am. The only discrepancy that someone would have in getting to know me is that they have an expectation of who they THINK I am and not who I have SAID I am. Whenever I think about the difference, the Oingo Boingo song “Who Do You Want To Be?” comes to mind, particularly the lyrics, “I’ve been reborn so many times, that I can’t remember them all”. Still, I feel that I am true to the person that I think that I am… and if you thought differently, I can’t help you.
I am glad that I moved here. This has been a great experience and I get to anticipate so many different things that once seemed to be fading in the distance. I enjoy the feelings of pleasure I get from sending spending money to KT, and soon enough, to Lexxie. I would add Skye to the list, if only she’d send me her address… BUT just because I mentioned it, do NOT think that I am mourning the lack of contact with her. If her and her Mother can live with it, you MUST know that I can as well.
There have been adjustments that I have made since my diagnosis of Traumatic Brain Injury. I take my time and I go at my own pace. Those who have invested in me and are genuine in their interests, I tend to give a wider berth to when making critical comments aimed at achieving my best interests. And when I have had questions or need advice, I also make every reasonable effort at incorporating the requested information into my thinking appropriately. But to be sure, I am making the life that I still believed was possible for me when I left Mookie Dee happen and more than that, I am very happy.
There have not been too many down moments and as for those that do occur, they hardly are compromising to my overarching ideals. I am closing in on a good year, one that I hope to improve upon. After all, I don’t have too much of anything on my mind other than the thoughts that pull me forward. Whenever I do lift my glance and look to the future, I keep finding my gaze cast across the horizon, all points available to me and within my range. And that is a feeling that I truly like.
My internal compass and the qualities that I possess have been proven true. The grander questions that anyone would have had for me have been rendered irrelevant by my continued progress. Right now, I cannot see myself failing in my pursuit of all that lay before me, awaiting my arrival and discovery of the one true way.
As to my broader thoughts on life in general… I don’t know if I have any of them worth sharing. Not that I don’t have the thoughts… for instance, what will happen if the G.O.P takes the White House in 2016? What will happen if there is another sudden economic meltdown, or a weather-related incident (to say nothing of finding myself embroiled in an incident on the street).
I have to amend my philosophical direction… it is overdue and I have not settled down to think about it exclusively. Perhaps I have been too busy living it, and the time hasn’t been there to sit down and dwell upon it. Still, I will make the time. It is ALWAYS the time to do what you need to do for yourself.