Monday, June 22, 2009

Monday Moanin'


If I don't seem suitably euphoric, it is because this isn't over yet. I have to still do what I have to do, and this is but another step in getting there.

This is a time not to celebrate, but for letting all the preparation I have been doing, shine. It has been a long time since someone has been THIS enthused with the idea of being with me. And it is a dream for me.

One of the things that I don't think I have ever managed to get across is that it take a lot of work to be in love. I have never imagined it to be easy to always find a smile when exerting oneself, but I do. It is my job to be this way, and I love my job!!

For me to say that I am going to work at loving you, it means that whatever it takes to make you feel loved, I want to do for you, and do it with relish. If that is my 'job', then that is what I want to do!

When I am out running and I am hurting, I keep on thinking of how cool it is going to be when I glance at my stop watch and see a faster time. It means I can imagine myself getting faster, maybe even one day being the fastest old cat around wherever I am at!

Same thing with anything I have ever done. One of the best compliments I got as a boxer is that I was an accurate puncher. Of all the things that I could and could not control, that someone noticed that about me, made me feel good. I worked at punch placement, and that is why it has stood out.

I remember a professor complimenting me for being a top flight student in an American History class ... I can't catch the course title. That took me back to being in jr. high and helping Hutch grade tests. He taught all of those Social Science courses, and I was already into that stuff.

Life keeps sending the same lessons back at you, because it is a course requirement. If you want to pass, you have to learn the lesson. In a most real way, I feel like that I have finally met my standard. Time to go on to the next level ... from 200 to 300 class, and from there we will be in 'graduate school'.

And then we will be living a 'happily ever after' life.


Ken is a 'big' guy? I mean by any measure he is a fit, strong looking cat. And it isn't 'popcorn size', the kind of size you get from working out the 'candy store' muscle groups and leave the other groups to fend for themselves.

One of the ways you can tell if a cat is 'big' as opposed to 'muscular' (for women, I guess it is the difference between 'voluptuous' and 'full figured'... I know that I like them both!). You can tell by the development in their calves. Skinny legs mean that they are only concerned with 'eye candy', the chest and arms. Legs muscles, take work and you may not notice the gains yourself. So you sort of ignore them as your work. Also, the stuff that helps your legs develop like walking/running, and real cycling doesn't impress the girls.

Leg work is a solitary activity. Having good legs is sign of someone who can focus on their bigger picture. They don't mind doing the things that will lead to a greater success down the line.

Guys his size would give me the most trouble, because they had enough heft to push me around, and tended to be mobile enough to get our of their own way. Kind of like Evander Holyfield to a Mike Tyson.


Perhaps now I know why I have that 'always love you' in me, despite what someone else may feel about me. When I think back to our time together(me & my SFC), I can remember doing whatever she wanted me to, making sure that what she needed she had.

Do we complete each other? One way to find out, and I expect that we will discover that we do. I think one of our biggest strengths is that we are aware of our weaknesses, and we are willing to do what we have to do in order to overcome them.

Oh, and that we understand the commitment that we are making to one another. Though it is not so always, having something as big as the Army in common means you 'get' the commitment part of being in a relationship. Her asking me if I was still up to my old tricks, meant that ...

... lets not over think things. We get enough about each other to confident enough to 'know' we are going to be together for the rest of our lives.

And as she would say, "The end!"


a corgi said...

awesome Mark (the second to the last paragraph) and I do agree, love does take work. I often think of it as an action word, a verb, you got to do it not just be "in" it. Love does take effort to just not feel the emotion but live out loving someone even when times/situations are hard and that person is not lovable. I think you are definitely on the right path to finding and attaining your plan for your life as you continue exploring your relationship with SFC.


Anonymous said...

I've been kind of tongue-tied lately and haven't been commenting or posting as much as normal.

I just wanted you to know: I really enjoy reading your blog. I like the way you write.

I'm still out here. :)

Bucko (a.k.a., Ken) said...

Funny thing is. I do work my calves, but not the rest of my legs... but I do cycle and run.

I can hardly believe that today is Monday - only a few more days until the rest of your life :o)

Celeste said...

Time is moving on.
Pat has small legs and big arms(bigger when we first got together)Small legs are so genetic for him. I have yet to see anyone in his family with legs! LOL

Being in love is so hard and so easy at the same time. I am hoping for you. Yes at 50 it is hard to not find someone without baggage.