JUST A REMINDER
I do really appreciate the comments left and the influence that they have had in my life. You all have made quite an impression on me in your comments and in your own personal storise, that helps me to keep on pushing thru.
Gene Smithson, former coach of WSU (that's Wichita State Univ. for the great unwashed!) created one of the all time best sayings that I have used since I first heard it ... MTXE, whic stands for Mental Toughness eXtra Effort. Thinking that repeatedly in my head, helped keep me walking around downtown Motown to do what I need to do.
Also, another journalist, Betty over at Koda's Corgi Tales, who's pastor was on the cover of Time magazine this week (no, not trying to inject any religious dogma in here ... this isn't THAT journal), and she was kind enough to share him with me ... and the thing was, that when I saw him, my mind saw HER ...
... and I didn't want to let her down by being tired and not getting things done. So I kept on, and I sit here with my mind clear, burdens a bit lighter. Can look forward to having a good weekend ... I KNOW I will ..!
LAST NIGHT ...
Tee Jay called. Two hour phone conversation. Haven't finished processing it yet. Will have something next week about it. Trust you me!
DEMANDING OF MYSELF
The cat who carried the flag for the US delegation at the Olympics was once a 'lost boy of Sudan'. From there he goes to becoming an Olympic athelete and college student. So you see, it really is about what kind of faith you have. "The greater the difficulty, the greater the glory surmounting it." -Epicurus
As you acknowledge that there are holes and crevices in life from which light does not escape, and there are doors that once you cross the threshold, you must like the shade of Dante, and "... abandon hope, ye that enter", if you can surmise what point I am making, then more than likely you ARE NOT at either of those dark places.
Where ever it is you are, that isn't one of those kinds of places on a true, real sense, it means if you aren't desiring the best of possible outcomes in your life because of something, you need to GET OVER IT. If a cat can go from the circle of darkness that is Sudan, then why can't I expect to be an assistant teacher in Nebraska?
Go ahead, tell me why ... I am here waiting ...
Though they are paired in the same 'divisions', there are differences between them, that I am noting to show that I haven't been dealing in cut outs of my self-delusion.
Both Tee Jay and Mookie are urban girls ... but Tee Jay has quite an edge on 'competitive experience' when compared to Mookie Dee. So should I run into an similiarly 'inexperienced' person, I can make the appropriate evaluation.
Pecan Sandie is a college grad, as is AKA. But Pecan Sandie's issue, a mecurial temper, she was aware of before we met. After she 'saw' my back story, she vowed to work on it ... and she did try, truth be told. I should have stuck things out with her. She was just before Tee Jay in my life, so as I got to Mookie, I felt that I had to endure a little before I called things over, you see?
AKA on the other hand ... what has me not really care for her family, isn't just that I think that they are mixed up, but because of HER. Sitting over with her peeps, Mom and Dad, or the whole gang, the house is over crowded, with all the elephants, hippos, rhinocerese ( a way cool French electronica band!) are in the place too ...
Because they allow for this, I haven't made the investment necessary to find out anything about the zoo that is in the room with her. She has observerd herself that I don't have any intentions of trying to 'save' her ... a novice swimmer should go after someone struggling in the water or they both may go down. So, I don't feel AT ALL any remorse or guilt in regards to our relationship. I stay up front with her and can't do no more than that.
Thanks again for the comments and the insights through your own journals. I will pick up after I get enough loot to get me ... A LAPTOP! Anywho, have the BEST WEEKEND EVER ..!