Wednesday, April 9, 2008

... what you find when you start packing ...

 
My brother’s calling … ah, can’t thing of any more euphemisms … passing was quick and sudden.  He was walking around, we were making arrangements for his rehabilitation, and I was going to move into his apartment, to keep it for him and to be there when he got home.  I was looking forward to taking care of my brother … again.
 
It is hard to really, really accept what happened last year.  I am giving myself a headache trying to hold back the emotion.  Why am I thinking about him?  Because I am still packing things, and I ran across this …
 
… his eulogy.
 
THE BROTHER THAT I KNOW …
 
I have never known a sweeter person.  Remembering when he made his debut as a 9lbs baby boy, there seemed to be something special about him.  He always has that bright smile, and even as a baby was quick to display it … and it was a frequent sight, as whenever you saw it, it usually meant that he needed to be changed!  That is when he was given the nicknames ‘Pamper’ and ‘Pamper-poo’ by our Aunt and our best cousin …
 
Growing up with him as your brother meant that you always had someone at your side in case anything came up … whether it meant delivering papers on the coldest, snowiest day of the year, or when you wanted someone to walk with you to the store … he was always ready and available …
 
Time passed and I left home, first for the Army, and the letter I would get from our Mother would speak of the young man he was becoming … she truly cherished him because he was so selfless … working at Burger King, often walking the three miles to get there … and then to give all of his little paycheck, though I am sure there would be some grumbles … but he did it, because he knew that she needed his help … make no mistake, there was a man in the house that sat in the middle of the block on Appleton Street …
 
And another thing that I know about the brother that I know … that has been confirmed by all the stories I have heard from you … is that he was ‘unreliably reliable’ … even though the schedule may say 10:00 a.m., he would waltz in at 10:15, but it was fine because you knew that the time he spent on his shift that his area was not just ‘covered’, but covered well by an exceptional employee who made certain that any customer encounter with him was truly an experience …
 
He was a great friend, I simply don’t know the words to express that any more than that.  Listening to all of you who came to show their respects, you know all know that to say that he would do anything for someone he called a friend is an understatement, because he again fills that role today …
 
I am not sure what my sisters thought was going on in his life … our Army sister probably knows him best right now.  But each one of us got the chance to say, ‘we know him best’, because he doted on you Jan, and the twins, he made sure y’all had a prom … myself, I never worried, just wondered, because I know how special a person he is … and I just wanted him to be happy.
 
I will never question if he lived a full life or if he fulfilled his life’s calling.  I really think that he was asked to do one last favor, before the winds of life took our Mother’s seed away, for us to gather at this time and for us to reflect on the brother that we know …
 

5 comments:

nightmaremom said...

hugs to you
d

dougsbabygirl31 said...

Wow! You were so lucky to have a brother like that. (((((((Mark))))))) I am sorry that you lost him.

Tawnya

lv2trnscrb said...

wow, Mark, that was beautifully written; he seems like such a wonderful guy; I am sure you do miss him a lot. Don't hold back the emotions; its okay to wonder why he was taken so young and its okay to miss him and grieve the hole he left in your family and even to shed a few tears. I think the world can't handle people's grief and we learn how to hide grief from others because they can't deal with it, but I think its good to grieve and to take all the time you need for grieving too so don't hold back those emotions.

betty

rdautumnsage said...

((Hugs)) Truly heartfelt and full of warmth. He lived his life well, caring for others before his own needs. Not too many people can make that claim in a lifetime. (Hugs) Indigo

malagutigrrl said...

Wow... this brought back memories of me trying to get through my eulogy for Pop.  It is those of us left behind that suffer the most from a death of a loved one. We're the ones left behind with giant holes in our hearts... and he certainly sounds as if he left a HUGE one.  I'm sorry for your loss.  How old was he?  Perhaps you wrote about him before I started reading you.  Sounds like he was a very young man...
Love you, buddy...
Cry.  It's good for you and him both.
xo
MJ