Sunday, April 6, 2008

Sports ... AS LIFE ..!

DID YOU HEAR ..?

The NCAA has decided to cancel the championship game Monday night ... no use in playing as it won't decide who the TRUE national champion is, as somehow, the conspiracy to keep the Tar Heels from winning it all was discovered by one of the FISA/Dick Cheney secret powers court late last night, when y'all were sleep ...

... but no, Kansas played very well.  The annoucers kept talking about how Carolina had 'heavy legs' and all that.  What that came from was not being 1) Tested during their ACC and NCAA post season, and 2) Playing all their games for the tournament IN North Carolina ...

... follow now ... recently on the show 'The Biggest Loser', they went to Australia.  They didn't work they way they normally did, and their weights reflected it.  You don't perform the same when you travel, and there is an adjustment to the surroundings.  I don't care what anyone says.  By Carolina not having a 'gut check' game in months, and not having to do more than ride a bus, they weren't ready to play a team who was used to the differences of travel and was tournament tested.

Uh, I like the little saying 'Rock, Chalk, Jayhawk'.  Ever since Danny and the Miracles won their title with Larry Brown.  Besides, John Calipari, the Memphis (State!!) seems slimy ...

GENERAL MUSINGS

All is well so far.  Get the baby up for church shortly, as the bus will pick her up and bring her home.  I will go shopping so we can have something to eat for the week!

A few comments have wondered about whether or not I would like to explore a relationship with Nebraska.  Better question would be whether or not Nebraska would like to consider a relationship with ME!  Just because I feel nervous butterflies and lightheaded thinking about her, doesn't me she thinks of me in the same way.  That is fine, I can deal with that and there isn't a rush to get back on that horse anyway.  But I wonder about her plans for her life, and where would I fit.  I have always viewed myself as a 'role player', and I don't think I may have a role in her life.

Woke up today with less anxiety about going back to Detroit.  I grew up there,and I have 'enough sense' (can't say, 'good' cause there ain't a whole lot of that in here!) not to purposefully get into trouble.  Anyway, thinking about all that, is putting the cart before the horse.  I have BUSINESS to attend to in the Motor City, and I want to see what my daughter Skye has been up to ...

The only 'peeking' into the future that I am doing, is going to shows at St. Andrew's and the Magic Bag, and riding my bike up through to Birmingham and stuff like that.  Hang with my BFF, who lives near my Dad, say hey to my Aunts, and just hang loose, no worries for a little while.  It is going to be interesting, falling back into the role of 'son, nephew, cousin, and good friend'.  In all the travels I have had in my life, this is the first time as an adult I have felt 'lonely' as opposed to being alone.

I can't teach anyone how to be good company.  And I don't feel up to guessing if someone else knows that they are supposed to 'fill in' the gaps between us, that I would meet them halfway.  I will visit Nebraska, and I will go out to see what it is like.  Not only do I have a sister in Chicago, I have ANOTHER sister, who is currently at stationed Ft. Leavenworth, which is some where around there in Kansas.

So I guess we will see if we like each other enough.

Besides, I KNOW that I am hurting over this.  I 'went there', trying to keep this relationship afloat, so that I can avoid hopefully, 'the Carolina Syndrome' and not be tough enough for when things get rough.  I feel sufficently up to the task, but I am going to have to do some recovery.  I still ask myself 'why doesn't she want me?', and with me taking car of HER BABY with MY NAME, makes my stomach knot up.  I won't have a good summer, and that is motivation enough in itself to keep on going.

Dag!  Thinking about all this is causing my thoughts to swirl ... no run, but a nice walk to get the paper and chill out today.  Hope y'all are having a good day, cause here it looks as though spring has sprung!

5 comments:

lv2trnscrb said...

so happy spring has sprung in Michigan!! that should put a smile on your face if nothing else cause I know its been a long winter for you; sorry your team didn't win;

you too enjoy your day, Mark

betty

nightmaremom said...

glad spring has hit......   now ya can watch post season
hugs
d

mpnaz58 said...

Hard not to look ahead when you itching to get going, yet needing to stay put, if only for a bit longer.  The whole deal with Nebraska...I think you mentioned that you didn't see a future with her because while you felt it for her, she didn't for you??  Yeah, thats a touch one, but...why do you want to be with someone who doesn't feel the same?  Rejection (if thats what it is) is a tough pill to swallow...been there, done that.  On the other hand, you had to take the risk to find out.  Life...goes on and on.  You seem calmer, even "chilled"...doesn't mean you feel that way inside...
xoxo ~Myra

toonguykc said...

My expectations for tomorrow night's game are pretty low.  I was frankly amazed we made it to the elite 8.

Russ

rdautumnsage said...

If someone doesn't find you fitting in those first few days...more than likely it's not the right fit altogether. I wouldn't worry much about what is wrong with you fitting into her life. That goes back to worrying about how people see you instead of how you percieve yourself. You know your a good guy and what you can offer. If someone else doesn't get it, it's their loss. Offer yourself up to someone who would appreciate it more. Otherwise I see the Mookie situation cropping up all over again. In the end you need someone who feels as good about you as you feel about yourself. Keep your chin up hon...I'm thinking Nebraska has blinders on at the moment. (Hugs) Indigo