...feeling strangely fine

CLOSING TIME

Today's evening entry was going to be of a different nature.  I was doing my usual watching of repeats of 'The Millionaire Matchmaker' and I was really feeling the way Patti was talking today.  She uses so much of the same language to assess and describe relationships as I do.  I am SURE I would do a good job of helping women find guys who are 'relationship ready'.

The show was very good (at least to me ..!), and this one client, who seemed to be very analytical, dropped a HUGE bombshell on his date ... that he was willing to MARRY HER.  Of course she agreed, pending some other things, but I know that feeling so very well.

Patti talked about some Jewish term for what occured between them.  She spoke of how despite her 'rules' what was she to do with something that came down from on high?  Me, I have been fortunate enough for that to happen to me, at least twice, possibly three times. at first sight.  No, Mookie isn't one of the three.  The first time it happened, it was in college and it was My Delta Girl.  After I bumbled that one away, it happened AGAIN, with my LBGF.

And the third time it happened ... when I saw Nebraska's PICTURE.  Now check it, 'love at first sight' isn't what you think it is.  It is something a little more involved than just seeing a hot babe or a buff dude, and swooning over him.

By 'that', I mean fall in love with someone and have this strange, unidentifiable feeling that something cosmic is really taking place.  It really works if you are able to be honest with yourself, and can hold up to your own introspection and are unafraid to reach for someone when you think that is the one you want.

Watching this guy made me feel a little sad, because it is providence that allowed me to find these special people, and my own failings that had me lose them.  But then I watched 'Oprah's Big Give' and I got over myself, and my faith in people was restored.

What would you do, if you could help change someone's life, for real?  I know that I have started playing the Mega Millions lottery, so that if I win, some of the people that I know, in the world and on the web, could have that boost up that they need.

The show was able to shake me out of what could have descended into a 'self-pity party'.  Then I thought back to our dinner.  Made a nice Meatloaf and some garlic mashed potatoes.  Lil' Mook likes the meatloaf, and every time I cook, watching her eat my food makes me feel like how some Mom's must feel when they feed their loved ones ...

... yes I still love the Mook's ... just that it isn't enough for us.

Anyway, that started me back up.  Then watching people given the opportunity to help change lives, I started feeling envious, but in a good way.  I don't necessarily need to be fully acknowledged, but it would be nice to just help people.

Sometimes, I wish that I could do more for people.  Not that I am altruistic or anything, just that if you need a hand, I will give you one.  So the show kept me from feeling sorry for myself, and made me appreciate what I have.

Because things could be so very much worse.