MAKING DREAMS COME TRUE

LOSING YOURSELF IN THE CHASE

To me, that is what the work you do to reach something is. The thing you are yearning for is there, but the compact on making your dreams come true, is based on the work you do to make them happen.

In fact, dream ARE true, it is reality that is false. At least the perception of it. Not going to get all existential, I happen to feel that the struggle is in the interpretation of things and expressing our real selves's to the world.

Myself, I would prolly WRITE than dance. I think that is what I miss about my 'pre-Mookie' life, the faith in that if I was going to work hard enough, then it was fine to dream my dreams. I didn't mind doing what I had to do, to get the piece of the pie that I saw myself having.

Thinking about my darling brother, that was the hallmark of his life. What he wanted, he got, and what he got, he worked for. It was NEVER easy for him. Don't know if I mentioned, but my brother was gay. When did he 'know'? I don't know about him, but I KNEW when he wanted to be Jamie Summers and thought that he could spin around real fast become 'Wonder Woman'!

THE EVIL OF INTERNAL STRIFE

So we got a brother in the White House. Yay! Can't wait for him to begin implementing his policy, and people, BLACK PEOPLE, start talking about how he isn't doing enough for 'his people'. Then they will start making comments about how, 'He ain't no full brother anyway,' and other equally inane and unlearned statements, as they wipe the 'red' kool-aid from their lips.

Because kids didn't understand what he was about, he got picked on mercilessly. Could help him only so much, and he lost interest in going to school. My Mom, bless her, let him stop when he turned 16, and he started to find his way.

I used to think that she didn't know, and we would have discussions about him. Even then, I would let her know that where ever I am, he would have a place. But his place was by her side. He wouldn't budge! After I started out trying to make my way, he 'took over', doing the Mark things for the twins and he and Jan always had their own connection.

THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD

When my Mom couldn't work, due to a bunch of stuff, she applied for welfare. Between that and what he would make working at whatever minimum wage job he could get (the one I remember most is the Burger King btw. 9 and 10 mile Road), to make ends meet.

What ever they would need as far as the house, the girls school, he made a way to make things happen. The observer would have said that he lived for his family, and he did. But he also had his own life, his own dreams. When our Mom taught us to ice skate, he took to it quickly. We would go to the Ice Capades, Ice Follies, Disney on Ice, Vodka on Ice (we keed, we keed!), and he was enthralled. The seeds were being planted, and he knew what he wanted to do.

But as he would have been entering his prime junior years, I was beginning my 'Sancho-less' ride through the hills of the world. So he stepped up and did what needed to be done. He may have grumbled, but he never complained. He never really asked 'why', as he simply got after what he wanted.

And he wanted to skate.

I can only talk about what he did. He competed in many competitions, even skating on the national level. I guess he was as good a figure skater as I was an amateur boxer. The thing about him, is that there wasn't any black guys skating, and other than Debbie Thomas, the only black thing on the ice, was the puck! It never bothered him that 'black people don't skate'. It's weird, when you start doing something that no one else says people do, if you want something bad enough, you will find other people walking on that narrow path.

When he was called, he had been one of the coaches for a skating club, coaching up some very good skaters. They were there when we laid him to rest. You all would have loved him. You wouldn't have had any choice! He was that kind of cat!

SAYING THAT TO SAY THIS

I won't claim to have inspired anyone in my family. To say that, is also to say that I also influenced some of their 'less than' qualities as well. But my brother and I were as similar as we were different. Being here in Detroit without him is quite strange. I wish he was here.